A dabhead’s dream

Ngaio Bealum is a Sacramento comedian, activist and marijuana expert. Email him questions at ask420@newsreview.com.

What is “terp sauce”? Is it any good?

—Nick Tar

“If a man does not have the sauce, then he is lost. But the same man can be lost in the sauce.”—Gucci Mane. Oh wait. You were asking about the new thing people are doing with cannabis concentrates. From what I have learned, “sauce” is created by taking some shatter, butane hash oil or live resin (these are all cannabis concentrates) and redistilling it, making it even more flavorful and powerful. I have heard reports of some sauces being up to 95 percent THC. That is hella strong, like the Magnús Ver Magnússon of cannabis products. I haven’t really smoked any, because dabs make me quiet and somewhat unproductive (although I do feel slightly telepathic on dabs, so that’s cool I guess) but all my dabhead homies dig it a bunch.

When I was a young stoner, we had two things: weed and hash. Sometimes, there was some kief. And that was it. Now there’s weed, hash, kief, BHO, live resin press, terp sauce, pure distilled THC, and a plethora of other cannabis products. These are the days of miracles and wonders, my friend. Stay saucy.

I have a lot of crabgrass issues in my front yard. What’s the best way to keep those out while allowing the lawn to grow healthy?

—The Fat Panther (via Twitter)

This is what I get for asking the internet to send me weed questions. My suggestion would be to plant marijuana. The more traditional solution is to pull the crabgrass out by hand. You have to do it by hand to get as much of the root as possible. Then, get some top-dressing soil and top-dress your lawn. Then reseed with some good varieties of grass seeds fitting your climate and area. Repeat next year until the crabgrass is eradicated. It takes a while, but I have faith in your abilities.

Does anybody still grow O.G. strands like Trainwreck, or is everything Fruity Pebble Thin Mint Cookie Kush now?

—Ol’ Skool

I know what you mean. Try finding a good Romulan or Chocolate Thai these days. You can still find Trainwreck, or at least some Trainwreck variants (look for Jack Herer or J1) but you may have to grow your own. As the market expands, the new cultivators want to have their own proprietary strains. It makes sense, because you can’t patent Trainwreck, but you can patent “Super Wreck Gelato Cookie Berry.” And yes, with legalization, folks are gonna try to “own” marijuana strains. I get it, but it’s weird. Cannabis has always been somewhat “open source,” so this new paradigm trips me out a little bit. My homie Swami (he’s been a grower for decades) has a line of old school heirlooms. Check him out at www.swamiseed.org. Oh, and SeedSupreme out of Humboldt has some Trainwreck for a good price. Overgrow the government.