Roger the Pinhead

Donald Trump. Mike Pence. Steve Bannon. Steve Miller. Sean Spicer. Kellyanne Conway. Michael Flynn. Jared Kushner. Paul Manafort. Roger Stone. Carter Page. Jeff Sessions. Scott Pruitt. Betsy Devos. Steve Mnuchin. Rick Perry. Paul Ryan. Mitch McConnell. Jason Chaffetz. Devin Nunes. Ben Carson. Tom Price. Rex Tillerson.

There ya go. Those are the people who (1) are calling the shots and/or (2) were involved with getting Team Twitler installed in Washington. My question here is a simple one and not rhetorical in the slightest. Is there one person on this list of names—just one—who is not a flaming fucking asshole?

Let’s focus for a minute on Roger Stone. Here’s a slimeball of extraordinary depth. What can you say about a crazed old codger who actually has the word NIXON tattooed on his back? In the Annals of Twisted, that factoid is worthy of an asterisk and special mention. I mean, pity the poor hooker who watches Rog take his shirt off, sees the tat, and says to herself, “Nixon? Jesus. I knew this was gonna be a rough one.” Anyway, something’s been buggin’ me about Stone for quite some time, and the reason always eluded me. Couldn’t quite put my finger on it, until recently. The light bulb went off.

Zippy the Pinhead. Zippy the Fucking Pinhead! Roger Stone is Zippy’s long lost Rethuglican brother! If you don’t remember Zip, the king of the non sequitor delivered in a muumuu, well, I can’t help you. Shit, he was around forever. In fact, he’s still around, doing his schtick on the funny pages. If you Goog “Zippy the Pinhead Roger Stone,” the first article will be, ironically enough, from none other than Brietbart, an article that tackles the Pinhead Proposition directly. By all means, check it out. As the author of the piece says, “It would explain so much.”

Trump recently warned that Obamacare was about to explode, and it will serve everybody right when it does, and you can all fuck off and burn in hell. Something along those lines. Well, just remember that Trump is a proven and unrepentant liar. Every time he opens his mouth, you have to remind yourself that he’s lying. HE IS LITERALLY ONE OF THOSE GUYS WHERE IF HIS LIPS ARE MOVING, HE’S LYING. Therefore, why would any sane American—estimates are that number is now in the low 60s—believe him when he assures us that Obamacare is about to explode?

The L.A. Times recently wrote about Trump and his presidency—“Still, nothing prepared us for the magnitude of this train wreck.”