Kitty Survivor: The Final Installment

A quick summary: Jazzy (mother and lover) and Cosmo (son and dumb) have paired off to combine feline wits in order to secure their portion of Purina chow. Wild Thing (scrappy scavenger) is minutes away from falling into my North Star steel cage trap. Itchy (bruiser) has recovered from his coon bite and has raided the neighbor’s camp, disqualifying him from any sort of recognition. And poor Zula (elderly and gassy) is convinced that the closet is the way out of the hut. To be blunt, animal activists have complained that it was unethical to hide the cat’s food for mere entertainment’s sake, though in my defense I was just trying to lessen the number of kitties eating out of the bowl. And so once again a rousing summer of intrigue and suspense is put to bed by a group of goodie-goodies. Bah.

DJ X, who hosts a local music only radio show on Saturday afternoons (1:30-3, KZFR 90.1 on your dial), has announced his intention to create a “family tree” of bands for Chico. Destined to be mightier than the famous Hooker Oak, this labyrinth of names will surely be impressive and dizzying. A footnote to this tree would have to be “famous rock couples” and “famous rock kids.” Now, I don’t want to go into the obvious necessity and cost of DNA testing that this branch would incur; suffice to say that we have a true son born of late. Welcome to Chico, Kenneth Charles Lovgren IV! Born to happy p’s Ken (Deathstar) and Mary (Antfarm), this kid is genetically blessed to rock this town! Hooray!!

Just when you thought the gender-bender corner of Fourth and Main streets couldn’t get any weirder, the infamous Towne Lounge has transformed itself from dark shadows to a bright shiny happy. From the sawdust floor (think Olive Garden) to its new stage (think Juanita’s), the place has already been rocking. Danny West, Pop Secret, Socially Pink. My god, it’s a friggin’ heyday.

Saw a couple of college kids at a video store the other day, and thus they spoke: “C’mon baby, let’s get this baseball documentary.” “No way.” “What about this Snoop Dogg movie?” “Nothing with violence.” “All movies have violence.” “I’m sitting on the floor till you find a movie.” “Shallow Hal, Shallow Hal, it’s funny." "Saw it!" "C’mon please help." "NO!" If this be the future, me thinks we be doomed!