Restaurants, beware!

illustration by MARK STIVERS

Fox’s hit show, Kitchen Nightmares, has been looking for nominations. If you aren’t aware of the show’s premise, celebrity chef Gordon Ramsay, known for his acerbic tongue, brash manner and educated palate, comes to restaurants that are failing for various reasons and whips them into shape (though, in the process, he usually makes the owner break down into fits of rage or hysterical crying). The restaurants he visits are usually the ones no one ever goes to anymore and that are at the edge of closing for good. So, Sacramento restaurants, beware.

Why the warning? You never know if someone (or everyone, for that matter) in Sacramento is nominating you. Is your service slow? The décor eyeball-searingly outdated? Is the food boring, uninspired, or just plain bad—and if it is, can you admit it? This is a chance to reflect, because if you are the Sacramento restaurant that gets that call from the producers, it’s a sure sign that people aren’t happy. However, it also demonstrates that Sacramento eaters want to see you succeed because they care about you and your establishment.