Oiled up

Ngaio Bealum is a Sacramento comedian, activist and marijuana expert. Email him questions at ask420@newsreview.com.

I am a single mother running a small herbal business. I make herbal body oils with an emphasis on herbs that promote pain relief, relaxation and restful sleep. I’d love to combine these herbs (especially St. John’s Wort) with infused cannabis oil this harvest season. It could bring profound relief to medical marijuana patients. How should I go about getting my product into dispensaries? Are there state regulations I need to follow, or anything else I need to know? Thanks so much for your good work; I read your column every week. Much love,


High! Herbal body oils and cannabis-infused lotions are the bomb. Many people use them for arthritis pain relief and I have heard that they can help with multiple sclerosis, too. Or you can rub some on just because it smells good. I tell you, a cannabis-infused massage is a great way to end your day.

Most cannabis clubs still see vendors the old fashioned way: Call, set up an appointment, go in and give them your pitch. Make sure your product is clean and professionally labeled. California doesn’t have any state guidelines yet, although if Gov. Jerry Brown signs Assembly Bills 243 and 266 (he has until October 11), there will be a flurry of regulations in the next few years. I know San Francisco has guidelines about edibles, but that’s about it. Good luck with your new business.

PS: If you are looking for some tips or maybe a new recipe, may I suggest the new book The Cannabis Spa At Home by Sandra Hinchliffe. This book has great recipes for everything from a quick salve to bath salts. Don’t smoke the bath salts, though.

I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me with indica! I’m a sativa girl all day long. What to do?


Nil desperandum, gentle reader. There is no reason for you to be upset. Think of this new aspect of your relationship as a feature, not a bug. Just think: He won’t be smoking all of your pot, and he will most likely be on or near the couch at all times. Having different tastes in weed is not a deal breaker. One time at a Grateful Dead show, I saw a couple sitting together. They each had their own joint, but they were passing a cigarette back and forth. Love will find a way. Happy toking.

Does everyone have their own brand of weed these days or what?

—Mark Etting

Yeah, they do. I just tried some Wiz Khalifa Kush, and it was strong. I would have liked a little more flavor but the effects were powerful. I know Kurupt has a hash product (Moon Rocks),Willie Nelson and the Marleys are supposed to be releasing strains soon and Margaret Cho just came out with her Cho-G Kush on the High Life label. (Disclosure: I am also on the High Life team. My strain, Blueberry Cookies, is superb.) Welcome to the future.