Frozen Pizza Is for Penguins

30 Thurs, Club Retro, 7 p.m., $8-$10.

Frozen Pizza Is for Penguins is one of those “Did my dog just fart?” monikers: a head turner that champions 1) greasy food, 2) a lovable animal, 3) clever public-service advice, 4) no political bias—or is it a snarky jab at global-warming naysayers. Anyway, FPIFP is this guy from Elk Grove named Jay, who—and it scares me to admit this—kind of looks like my doppelganger, only 10 years younger (and if I was really, really into Fall Out Boy). Uh, the music? Sounds like ambient trance meets Kanye West Auto-Tune meets Tycho meets those musical interludes on The Hills. Oh yeah, you know you want it. 6521 Hazel Avenue in Orangevale;