Love yourself

Make self-compassion your year-round resolution

We tend to beat up on ourselves if we don’t meet goals—if we, say, fail to follow through on our New Year’s resolutions. But there is alternative: self-compassion. This means treating yourself with kindness when things go wrong, and it’s something worth practicing year-round.

Rewrite your negative self-story: Every time you notice you’re being hard on yourself for, say, eating too much pizza last night or procrastinating on your homework this morning, give it a rest. Momentary lapses don’t mean you’re a bad person.

Stay present: Self-compassion is different depending on the situation. Maybe you need to have a good, long cry, or maybe you need to kick yourself in the pants and get something done.

Put self-care first: Prioritize the activities and habits that bring you health and happiness, rather than pushing them off until you’ve done your work for the day.

Let it hurt: Don’t block out difficult emotions. Step into the discomfort, longing and pain and find value and substance in these experiences.