Rated 3.0

Throw Shia LaBeouf into Jimmy Stewart’s shoes and hand him a pair of binoculars to spy on the neighbors and … What? You’ve never heard of Rear Window, and think Alfred Hitchcock was some old British singer who sang about balloons and wasps? Oh, in that case, this suburban angst thriller should play fairly well for you. A kid under house arrest spies on his neighbors and as he passes his voyeuristic gaze past the cute nubile across the way, realizes that he may have seen the creepy one in the middle of a murder. And the suspected serial killer knows he knows. Because he left the damned shades open. Silly serial killer. Like, whatever. It’s OK if you haven’t anything to stack it up against … like, an original thought, y’know?