Days of Lore

Guns <i>not</i> blazin'.

Guns not blazin'.

The television strikes back
The Writers Strike is officially over. Sure, it was a great day for the boob-tube and all of its peepers, but what about me? I’m left in the dust.

During the past three months, I actually enlisted quite the stable of ghost-writers from 24, who were so kind as to keep their writing chops razor sharp right in this little space (all it took was that big ol’ Wal-Mart ad to help pay them!). Where do you think eloquent passages like “Joe Schecklebutt and his Magnum Opus All-Star Skin-flute Orchestra is playing at Laxson Auditorium this week” came from? I cannot and will not take credit for such brilliance.

Now the writers are back … forever lost to television, like so many a red-blooded American. Sad.

A little help from his friends
I swear I thought Matt Hogan was going to walk through the door any moment. Some people actually thought they saw him a few times. I bet he was there somewhere.

The Feb. 16 musical tribute to the late, great guitarist was an all-day jamboree that brought out musicians and friends to celebrate with song and drink. Members of Matt’s past bands jumped on stage throughout the day, and a few bold souls paid homage to Matt by taking to the tabletops and slinging a guitar behind their heads.

Particularly impressive was Loki Miller, the young guitarist who played in a band with Barbara Manning and Matt till the end—he went balls out during a rousing rendition of AC/DC’s “It’s a Long Way to the Top (If You Wanna Rock ’n’ Roll).”

It was a good time … and the bar sold out of Budweiser early. See? I told you Matt was there.

Keeping up with the Jones
OK, I watched it. I watched it, and I liked it. The first trailer for Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull premiered on Valentine’s Day on Good Morning America before posting to the movie’s Web site and the rest of the Internet. I was giddy as a schoolboy, and had to watch the bootlegged version the night before. Aren’t you glad I’m comfortable enough to share my embarrassing moments with you?

The trailer begins with flashbacks to the first three films—no cheesy narration, just text that alludes to each movie—before cutting into the theme music as Indy picks up his hat and puts it on, silhouetted on an Army Jeep. From there it’s a montage of action sequences and a few one-liners that follow the spirit of the original films. OK, I’m comfortable sharing these moments, but I will not divulge how many times I’ve actually watched the trailer.

One thing that caught my eye was the odd segue between the flashback segment and the new footage that showed the American flag flapping in the wind. Seemed random to me.

Interestingly, the international version of the trailer doesn’t include the flag. The international version also includes guns! Turns out the gun barrels were CGI’d out of the American trailer because it ran with the PG-rated Spiderwick Chronicles. Both versions are available online.

It’s too bad that one man has made the American flag taboo. But hey, Indiana Jones will be here May 22, and George Dubya will be gone (in our hearts and minds, at least) Nov. 4.

Quick! Black History Month is almost over! That means there are only a few days left to celebrate the contributions of African Americans!

I said it a year ago: We should add another 11 months to Black History Month.