Sacramento’s 10 most annoying things of 2007

10. Sacramento school-board meetings

Between the Russian anti-gay protesters and the same three cranks who turn every chance for public feedback into a “this is why the school board sucks” rant, these sessions often resemble episodes of The Jerry Springer Show.

9. The Sac State Hornets’ gym

I wanted to buy a ticket to see a basketball game this season, but the 20 seats were already sold out.

8. Lisa Heyamoto’s column

The Sacramento Bee should include a hypo full of insulin on the days this is published. At least it’s a change of pace from the “Maloofs suck, cops rule” formula made famous by ex Bee-guy R.E. Graswich.

7. Eric McDavid

Goes on a hunger strike to protest the lack of a vegan menu in the Sacramento County Jail. Last I heard, you could get all the tossed salad you want in that place.

6. Mike Bibby

The Kings’ point guard’s thumb injury was a major disappointment. Now it’s going to be at least 10 weeks before he can come back and get traded.

5. SN&R’s “Higher Ground” faith section

I’m all for devoting a section of the paper to subjects about using your imagination. But they’ve yet to do any features on unicorns or Bigfoot. The intolerance must stop!

4. The Highway 50 interchange

This clusterfuck nightmare merging nexus, where 80, 50, 99 and 5 meet, is like the driving equivalent of a Sudoku puzzle. Special thanks to all of those great drivers who won’t let you merge right to exit, then end up switching lanes to the left once you finally get in.

3. The California State Fair

No freak shows or gypsies to speak of, and the carneys actually have teeth. No wonder people still think of Sacramento as a cut-rate town. It’d sure be nice if they moved it to a month when you didn’t have to walk around on 150-degree blacktop.

2. The Press Club’s men’s room

Remind me to never walk barefoot in there again.

1. Doris Matsui’s hair

Doesn’t anyone in the 5th-District congresswoman’s staff have the nerve to mention that her hairdo looks like a circumcised penis?