Letters for April 26, 2018

Bring back brown weed

Attn. Ngaio Bealum: I’m not alone in this; anyone who smoked throughout the 1970s and are alive and still smokin’ today remembers the bricked and baled weed that was smuggled here primarily from Central and South America. This was real smoking weed! Legendary names such as Colombian “Santa Marta” Gold, Acapulco Gold, Panama Red. Marijuana that was yellow (“gold”), red and brown. These were seriously spicy, tasty buds with ear-ringing, eye-watering, coughing-fit potency one doesn’t forget. Even littered with hella seeds, the crop grown closer to the equator, and at a certain elevation, ruled over any domestic bud. I’m still waiting to see the return of genuine “smoking weed”… weed grown and cured with smoking pleasure in mind and not just effect.

The pot shops all feature a shelf or two covered with jars full of green buds. They say, “These buds are for vaping because smoking is bad for you.” Get real! Ninety-nine percent of buds sold anywhere are gonna be smoked. Only growers can afford to vape, and I personally feel vaping weed is disrespectful to the spirit of the sacred herb. None of these “cannabis experts” seem to understand anything about smoking chlorophyll, the green in green buds.

Take tobacco. It grows green, and can be dried green, but you’ll never see green tobacco in a cigarette. Chlorophyll burns excessively hot, thus imparting a harshness if smoked. It’s simply not cool. Marijuana, especially sativa, grown under the sun for a full season, will change color in the late fall like all other weeds and leaves. These fall colors are so tasty, even “smooth,” when smoked I promise you’ll never want to smoke green bud again.

I’ve been smoking pot daily since 1973. I have smoked all the above mentioned and even tried the possibly extinct “African Black” sativa grown by the Pygmy tribes of the Utari Rainforest in deep Congo, Africa. I know great weed, and am disappointed that the time isn’t being taken yet to offer a truly pleasureable-tasting smoking weed. A shop that offered the weed(s) I speak of would be an instant hit!

I think I’m waiting on the feds to de-schedule our holy sacrament. Not only will this allow banks in on the money, it will open the importation of smoking weed from all over the globe. Let the prices reflect the supply and demand. Only then will Old King Cole have a merry bowl.

Sincerely in the faith,

M.W. “Malozone” Malone

via U.S. Mail