Welcome to this week’s Reno News & Review.
I don’t resent feeling under the weather half as much during the week as I do when I lose a weekend, but such was the story.
I’ve become kind of a weirdo when it comes to working out. I’ve gotten in the habit of doing at least a half hour of strenuous exercise every day, and I miss it if I … um … miss it.
So Friday after work, I went to the gym. I was excited to go, since I weigh myself on Fridays, and I felt like I’d descended from a long term plateau. I lifted hard and heavy, and I felt great. After my workout, literally on my way to the sauna, I hung myself on the inversion table (one of those doodads that hangs you by your ankles), a habit I’ve found makes my back feel less tense. When I righted myself, I couldn’t lift my foot high enough to leave the device. My lower back was in full on spasm, something I haven’t felt since February 2007.
The slightest twisting motion sent flares of color through my vision, and I wasn’t absolutely sure I could hold my bladder. As soon as I could lift my foot high enough to go up a step, I attempted to find a masseuse, hoping I could get whatever nerve that was pinched unpinched.
The color blasts in my vision soon got so great that, not only could I not wait for the masseuse to bring around a chair, but I was afraid I was going to pass out—and I was also terrified of the damage I might do by collapsing while my spine was being wrenched by muscle cramps. So an ambulance was called.
Long story short … the paramedics provided me a gurney on which to lie while my muscles stopped spasming. I eventually was able to stand and walk, then drive home, where I took a pile of Flexerils, and spent most of my weekend on the floor watching movies. Three days later, I’m awaiting my appointment to get Rolfed. And if I needed any further proof I’ve become kind of a weirdo—hoping to do cardio tomorrow.