I witness

I saw you washing off your kid’s dirty diaper in Sycamore Pool. I watched as your little crap-monster’s vile turds bobbed across the nearly still water to be sucked up by some unwitting little child.

Thanks to you and your no-hygiene ilk, no kid I ever have charge of will know the joys of playing in the One-Mile pool. Your fecal-coliform-infested disposable has ruined that, you no-brain contaminator.

Hey, I have an idea. How about if I come over to your house and take a dump in your bathtub?

Keep the “poo” out of “pool,” moron.

Send us your rants, kudos, or sightings. Keep it to 100 words. You must identify yourself for us to process your submission, but we’ll keep it confidential. Mail: Iwitness c/o CN&R, 353 E. 2nd St., Chico, CA 95928 or email: iwitness@newsreview.com