Days of Lore

I’m going to hell for this.

I’m going to hell for this.

The boys (and girls) are back in town
Hello there. For those of you who are new to Cheek-Oh and picking up this paper for the first time, I would like to welcome you to HELL! Ha ha, just kidding … more like HELLA AWESOME!

You have definitely chosen a fun town to spend your next two to eight years of college—there’s Bidwell Park, and tons of art galleries, music venues and theater houses to keep you occupied … oh, and bars, lots and lots of bars. And don’t worry if you find yourself headed straight for that eight-year plan, because I, Mark Lore, built a magical time machine that can whisk you off to graduation with the push of a little button.

Don’t believe me? When you stumble upon a photo of Johannes Gutenberg in that European Civilization class (HIST 110 in the Chico State catalog) and he’s holding an iPod in his hand—that was a little token of appreciation from me.

If you choose to graduate the old-fashioned way (borrrring), tune in here every week for the who’s who and what’s what in local music and pop culture—not to mention all the good-natured sarcasm and good-for-nothing pabulum you can take, handle and stomach. And pick up the CN&R for all the news and arts coverage you’ll ever need, along with the most comprehensive calendar in town. For those of you who are returning, you know the routine.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’d better get some more time traveling in before this contraption falls apart on me …

Righting the wrongs
I just broke the news to a group of pimply-faced KISS fans that in less than four years their favorite band in the whole wide world will remove the makeup and thus suck. They don’t believe me, and I don’t have the heart to show them the proof.

It’s Nov. 7, 1979. The Forum in Inglewood, near L.A. At the very concert my mom wanted to take me to as a child … the show my dad refused to allow his 6-year-old son to attend. I’m here, and I’m taking it back! The band is just finishing its encore, a little ditty called “Black Diamond,” and I can now die a happy man.

And if you think Gutenberg with headphones is ridiculous, you should see the self-portrait Van Gogh did of himself after we hung out and downed a bottle of absinthe … freaky. All I did was turn him on to a great rock band, and he lent me his ear.

Schoolhouse rock
While all this time travel is fun, and has been taking up a lot of my time, I still have a job to do in the year 2007 (it’s very complex, but I must perform my duties here in order to keep the space-time continuum from being disrupted—i.e. ruining my future).

So, I’m going to let you in on a few of the events coming up in the next week that will make you, the student (or anyone for that matter), a lot cooler than you were last week.

First, head to our cement-y downtown City Plaza Sat., Aug. 25, and check out the action taking place with S.F. blues band Ride the Blinds, hip-hop trio One Block Radius (featuring former Chico dude Marty James, and badass Z-Man) and Aaron Ross, formerly of Sacto math-noisemakers Hella. That show starts at 6:30 p.m.

Later on, Ride the Blinds will join local roots-funk rockers Jack Shat and the Know-it-Alls at Off Limits at 9:30 p.m. Ross will also perform later, at the 1078 Gallery, at 9:30 p.m., with local acoustic wonderkind Catlike Reflexes and Grass Valley’s Madame and the Mustache (with Spencer Seim, also formerly of Hella).

If you’re feeling artsy (but not fartsy), check out the closing reception for Christine “Sea Monster” Fulton’s Grand Dearie’s Death Castle exhibit in the Humanities Art Gallery. It’s right on campus! You don’t even have to move! But you have to think fast: The reception is today (Aug. 23) from 5 to 7 p.m. There will be a performance and probably some goodies to nibble on.

There. You’ve been learned.