Flicks to feast by

This month starts with “Nov” and ends in “ember,” so that means it's time to feast—and feast hard.

In honor of the season for stuffing one's face until pores ooze mulched turkey and pie, I'm offering up a list of movies that feature great moments in eating. Not just movies about eating hot dogs and cake and whatnot, but all forms of eatables. If it can go in the mouth, be masticated, and then shat out your ass, it can be on the list. Sorry, that was graphic, but hey, it's what happens, right?

I remember watching this in an art theater in Plattsburgh, New York. It had a lot of food in it, and it made me hungry. Don’t let the traditional nature of this entry fool you, because I’m in a weird mood after the elections, and I’m going to get a little bizarre.

The ultimate depiction of gluttony, Mr. Creosote (Terry Jones), dines at a fine restaurant until he projectile vomits. He continues to eat despite projectile vomiting until a wafer-thin food portion causes him to explode, spraying vile bile everywhere.

I know I always cite my favorite movie, Jaws, in lists like this, but this time I’m going with the sequel. The noticeably fake shark comes up under somebody and eats them in one gulp, punctuated by the shark’s cheeks puffing out. It’s so cool.

There’s something so perverse about the way Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day Lewis) eats his steak, picking at it with his fingers shortly before caving in Paul Dano’s head with a bowling pin.

Another one where humans are the delicacy of choice, but this time it’s a plant doing the eating. I highly recommend checking out Frank Oz’s original ending for this film, where giant alien plants take over the world. It’s so much better.

Arms, legs and intestines are on the menu in George Romero’s best zombie movie. I made the mistake of watching this on a date night after ordering a pizza for my girlfriend. This was a bad idea on so many levels.

One of the best eating scenes ever features Malcolm McDowell’s Alex being spoon-fed a meal during a conversation. He chews joyfully and prominently, and opens his big mouth for more in a way so memorable I included him in this article.

If you saw this, you just can’t eat at McDonald’s without feeling like the biggest jerk in the world. Morgan Spurlock stuffed himself, Mr. Creosote style, with Quarter Pounders and Big Macs until he puked. This movie actually killed the Supersize Fries!

Lots of candy gets ingested in this one, but it’s the blueberry gum that scores the biggest moment. I remember this seemed like a world of heavenly candy delights when I was a kid, but I recently re-watched this and the stuff they eat looks pretty gross.

We won’t talk about what gets eaten in this one.

A couple of best friends get the munchies and begin a majestic quest for the world famous sliders. This movie single-handedly resurrected the career of Neil Patrick Harris, but sadly, did not result in White Castle coming to Reno. You just have to settle for the frozen supermarket ones. It’s not the same!

The little green morsels are people food! Dah, this was an obvious choice. Shame on me … you have to do better, Gilbert!

I’m trying to be original here by leaving obvious choices like Chocolat off this list. Oh … wait.

For credibility’s sake, I’ll throw in another more traditional entry about cinematic food and eating. This one made me hungry, too.

Here’s another chef movie with lots of food. Actually, this one sucks a bit, with Bradley Cooper slumming. I guess I’m kind of padding. Hey, this list needs a lot of movies!

No movie will make you crave Italian food like this one. The prison scene alone, with Paulie making the sauce while Henry scavenges for bread, will have you craving pasta over turkey.

Hey, the kids need something, right? You can’t be showing them The Human Centipede during the holidays. Or maybe you can, if you are a really freaky parent.

Last year’s best film earns a place on the list for the scene where Leonardo DiCaprio feasts on an actual raw bison liver.

Does anybody remember this strange Nicolas Cage film where he thinks he’s a vampire and eats a live cockroach?

Nope … don’t watch this one. Take a day off. Go Christmas caroling. Build a snowman. Punch a clown.

John Belushi stacks up his food tray and then ends it all with a ball of the Thanksgiving mainstay—mashed potatoes. Then, of course, food fight.

Nothing to do with food and not an actual movie. I just wanted to slip my two cents in.

Again, for credibility’s sake, I’ll throw a family/holiday film into this article. Let us salute this Christmas classic, and the mauling of that turkey by the Bumpus dogs.

We must include an entry that features one of the most famous dinners ever, the Last Supper. It also has Jesus getting his side ripped off with a cat o’ nine tails for those who like their Bible movies super bloody. By the way, Jesus didn’t put out a very good spread for his last feast. Bunch of bland pita bread and cheap wine. Come on, he’s Jesus! He could’ve conjured up some White Castle Sliders and Cherry Coke!

Here’s another one for the kids, a wonderful movie about a rat that cooks for a cook. This reminds me that I should watch this again. I’ve only seen it once.

This contains perhaps one of the most infamous eating sequences in cinema history, the one in which Paul Newman has his stomach stuffed with hard-boiled eggs. Actually, save this one for Easter.

This instant classic cartoon is not suitable for kids, but is now available for digital download. Seth Rogen and friends play articles of food that find out their destiny is to be eaten. This one is a sick howl.

Two brothers open an Italian restaurant, and the results are tasty, indeed. I’m running out of funny quips. Hey, this election thing has bummed me out!