No dank, no dosh

Ngaio Bealum is a Sacramento comedian, activist and marijuana expert. Email him questions at ask420@newsreview.com.
This is an extended version of a story that ran in the July 28, 2016, issue.

I am a 37-year-old mom that suffers from bipolar and major depressive disorder. I am on prescription meds but they don’t always work. Sometimes the only thing that will pull me out of a deep, suicidal depression is smoking a pure sativa strain of medical marijuana. I have my recommendation from a doctor and am able to obtain it from dispensaries. However, I live in Rancho Cordova and have realized there are 0 dispensaries to be found in my city. City Council has deemed that medical marijuana dispensaries are “a public nuisance in that many violent crimes have been committed that can be traced back to the proliferation of marijuana dispensaries, including armed robberies and murders.” I did some minor fact checking and found that this simply is not true. In fact, what the statistics have shown is that crime has actually decreased in areas where marijuana has been legally sold and removed from the “black market.” Areas where dispensaries have been closed for whatever reasons, have seen an uptick in crime following the closures. Another argument that City Council is using is that “increased noise and pedestrian traffic, including out of area criminals in search of victims, are commonly encountered just outside of marijuana collectives, cooperatives and dispensaries.” As someone who has been to several dispensaries, I feel that this too, is just not accurate. I have never noticed them to be “noisy” or dangerous. In fact, with the presence of a security guard at each location, I feel safer coming and going from dispensaries than I do coming or going from bars, where I have noticed an increase in noise levels. Their third and final argument is that “allowing med mj collectives, co-ops and dispensaries would be inconsistent with the City of Rancho Cordova’s city-wide goals which include, foster a positive image of Rancho Cordova, ensure a safe community, and foster responsible citizenship, therefore to protect the integrity of the city and the goals on which the city was founded, the city council finds that it is in the best interest of the residents of the city to prohibit marijuana dispensaries.” Are you able to steer me in the right direction of whom to talk to or how to go about getting a city council to change an ordinance?

—Blue Jay

You make some very valid points about cannabis clubs being safe and cool and clean and awesome. However, please don’t expect reasoned and well-thought-out arguments to win the day. Most elected officials, like the good people of the Sacramento County Board of Supervisors and especially the ones in Rancho, are unable to listen to reason when it comes to matters of the cannabis plant. We tried using common sense and valid, reasoned arguments years ago and they listened politely, agreed with us and then banned clubs anyway. Sigh.

Like you pointed out in your letter, there are studies showing that crime rates go down in areas that have cannabis dispensaries. I have no idea why cities and counties continue to do themselves (and their tax base) a giant disservice by continuing to ban cannabis businesses. My one gripe with the proposed Adult Use of Marijuana Act (and Medical Marijuana Regulation and Safety Act, enacted last year) is that cities and counties still have the power to ban cannabis. Although, AUMA does have a rule where if a city or county bans cannabis businesses, they don’t get access to any of the cannabis tax money. Hopefully, this will compel some cities and counties to get with the times, but I am not optimistic.

As to how you can get your board of supes on the cannabis bandwagon: Good luck. You may need an entirely new city council. Maybe you should run for office.

I read that the water supply in Colorado is tainted with THC. True?

—Og Waifina

Nope. Although the town of Hugo, Colo., (population 700, no canna-businesses allowed) did claim to have found THC in one of the town’s wells, further testing by the county showed this hysteria to be unfounded and most likely due to faulty tests. Duh. Surprise. You don’t even need a test to tell you this, you just need science. THC, the chemical in pot that gets you high, is mostly insoluble in water, so it doesn’t bind to water molecules—meaning THC-infused water is a scientific improbability.