The new GOP question

It’s always notable and just plain fun when two great comedic minds merge and unify on an important theme. This happened recently as Bill Maher melded with John Oliver, who said back in February that Team Trump’s agenda looked like a “To do” list on a refrigerator—Satan’s fridge, that is. Well, Maher linked up with J.O. last week when he noted that the current batch of Republicans are no longer interested in advancing conservative policies, but are instead now asking a simpler question when developing new political actions—What Would a Dick Do? To support his case, Maher cited recent Rethuglican bills that eased regulations on ridiculous non-issues like lead bullets and asbestos insulation.

These are the latest reminders that the enemy of the people truly is THE REPUBLICAN PARTY. I mean, Jesus, they’re like a bunch of Snidely Whiplashes (remember ole Snidely?), twirling their mustaches and thinking of shitty things to do to people. I remember the light bulb went off for me in 2014, when Republicans were voting to give oil companies billion dollar subsidies. How can this be, I naively wondered, giving billions to fat cats like Exxon and Chevron. In contrast, we give a miser’s pittance to valuable institutions like Planned Parenthood (500 mill), Amtrak (1.3 bill), the Corporation for Public Broadcasting (450 mill), and the National Arts Endowment (146 mill), yet Congress still has the gall to bestow billions on Big Oil. Why? It becomes clear when you realize Repubs have zilch, zero, zippo interest in helping the middle class, but instead now serve three masters—corporations, the military industrial complex, and the ultra wealthy.

Which explains why I’m on the edge of constant projectile vomiting when I hear Twitler and his simpering sycophants moan about our ragged and depleted military, and why it’s extremely, crucially, vitally important that the military budget be increased by 54 billion this year. What a load of steaming steer poop. Our defense tab last year was 600 billion, which is equal to the budgets of the next eight largest countries on our ammo-crazed planet. Depleted military, my ass. You want extra funding? Have a fucking bake sale.

How about we take 2.4 bill off Defense, give it to Amtrak, PP, CPB, and NEA, and tell the Defense Department to try to scrape by on 597.6 billion. But obviously, I’m either (1) dangerously out of touch, or (2) sane.

This Saturday, 11:30 a.m., it’s the Hey Trump Cough Up Your Taxes rally in Wingfield Park. Millions across the country will hit the decks for this one, and rightly so. Should be fun.