Space Whale hunted, butchered by local all-you-can-eat sushi restaurant
CITY PLAZA, RENO—Posing triumphantly for a photo with their fresh kill at their feet, the staff of Ishizuka Sushi Bar confirmed to reporters earlier today that they had successfully hunted the Space Whale as an addition to their all-you-can-eat menu.
“We were at it all day,” said Jerry Ono, head chef at Ishizuka, wiping his brow and reclining in the shade as his assistants sharpened the long filet knives brought for the occasion. “It gave us quite the fight, but we’re happy to say that Reno residents can expect a rare delicacy at Ishizuka in the coming weeks.”
The Space Whale, the steel and stained glass sculpture commissioned by Burning Man artist Android Jones, has stood in Reno’s City Plaza since 2017 and has long been prized in South Asian cultures for its blubber, which is eaten raw or with a few drops of soy sauce.
“I have fond memories of my grandmother preparing Space Whale on birthdays and holidays as a child,” Ono said, directing the staff to start carving from the flesh beneath the pectoral fins while waving away the flock of seabirds that had gathered to peck at the carcass. “That’s where the meat is most tender, and a Space Whale this big will provide hundreds of pounds. We’ll be serving this all summer.”
After spotting the Space Whale from their lightweight, rubber dinghy on the Truckee River, the culinary staff of the Japanese-fusion restaurant and cocktail bar fired a series of steel harpoons from their craft into some of 2000 stained glass panels of the sculpture’s exterior. Ono assured reporters that the Space Whale was ultimately slaughtered in the most humane method available, a single puncture through the art installation’s Volkswagen-sized heart.