Silver Legacy Spokesperson Reveals
‘This Death Star is almost operational!’
The Silver Legacy’s mysterious “composite dome,” a large, white ball approximately the size of a small moon, is a powerful weapon soon to be capable of destroying entire star systems. The weapon, known by the code names “Death Star” and “Project C,” is not yet operational but will be soon. This was revealed Wednesday in an unusual press conference given by the scientist, Silver Legacy spokesperson and probable mercenary who insisted on being known only as “Boba.”
“Nothing like this has ever been seen in this galaxy,” claimed Boba, “It is a fearsome weapon, and the fury that it will unleash is not to be believed.”
The revelation of the dome’s awesome power was met with mixed reactions. Many local residents are concerned about the presence of the so-called “Death Star” but are relieved that the strange Silver Legacy dome, long a boil on the downtown skyline, actually has a function.
Additionally, the large piece of equipment inside of the dome is not, as was long assumed, a facsimile mining rig.
“People heard ‘mining rig’ and immediately assumed it was some sort of replica from a bygone era. This couldn’t be more incorrect,” said Boba. “Actually, it’s a technological breakthrough. You see, ‘MINING RIG’ is an acronym. It stands for ‘Megalithic Intergalactic Nuclear Irradiating Nullifying Germinating Ray Ion Gun.’ It is the Silver Legacy’s primary tool of destruction.”
Boba went on to explain that the “Death Star” was the brainchild of Silver Legacy figurehead Sam Fairchild, long assumed to be a fictitious character, who is, in truth, a real man and still alive today. He has survived since his mining boom days, nearly 160 years ago, because of a rigorous diet consisting of vitamin-heavy smoothies and pure unfiltered evil.
Boba repeatedly stressed that the “Death Star” will be of great benefit to local residents. “Lord Fairchild cares about his Renoian Empire. Among the first targets used to demonstrate the Death Star’s annihilating power will be the Indian casinos in Northern California. The elimination of these pesky usurpers will benefit all Reno residents—not just the gaming industry.”
There are also plans to update the bowling stadium, where the Silver Legacy’s sister dome is located, with powerful weapons of its own. However, Boba made it clear that even if the bowling stadium were to be armed, its power would be subordinate to the Silver Legacy. “All shall tremble before the power of the Silver Legacy,” he said.
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