Prophet able

Jack Van Impe Presents

Jack and Rexella Van Impe present a show that appears on Sunday nights at 11:35 on KTVN/2.

Jack and Rexella Van Impe present a show that appears on Sunday nights at 11:35 on KTVN/2.

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“Sorrow looks back; worry looks around; but faith looks up,” said Rexella Van Impe, wife of the “Walking Bible” and “one of the world’s foremost prophetic scholars,” Dr. Jack Van Impe.

You know it’s not like me to take anyone’s faith with anything but a presumption of sincerity, but this is some of the more surreal religious programming I’ve ever seen. I mean, I’ve heard one or two or 20 people over the years claim to be prophets, but I’m having a hard time taking this time seriously.

I’ll be honest with you—at the risk of undermining my own argument—and admit I don’t know very much about Dr. Jack Van Impe. Suffice it to say, he appears to be a right-wing Catholic who rails against Protestant religions and other faiths, particularly Islam. The couple, presumably married, has a television program that shows in Reno on KTVN/2 on Sunday nights at 11:35 p.m. They also have an internet site with lots of audio and video downloads at www.jvim.com.

I’d be surprised if I had ever come across this alternate universe if a friend hadn’t told me about it, and I’ll admit, he’d colored my objectivity, but his dismissive description of the show and the couple was conservative at worst. If you were watching the show and didn’t know what you were watching is supposed to be genuine, you could be forgiven if you thought it was some Saturday Night Live skit. It’s that … refreshing.

I actually downloaded several of the MP4 files. The show is only a half-hour long, so it’s not hard to get through. Essentially, Jack Van Impe is a prophet of the end times, Armageddon, the Rapture and all that. Among other things he says is that the world can never end. The Bible says quite clearly that Jesus’ post-apocalyptic kingdom will go on forever. And, if I understand Van Impe, it’ll be populated by some of those who are currently dead and two-thirds of those who are currently living. He’s not talking about some point in the distant future. He’s talking about now, and President Obama is the guy who’s going to cause it all by bringing a false peace to the Middle East.

But Russia and China, those baddies, are not interested in peace, and they’re going to go to Israel, with waves of armies 200 million strong, to do battle with the antichrist.

Among Van Impe and his wife, Rexella’s, revelations or statements or what have you:

• Someone said, “How come you look so good for your age, and I say, ‘Because my wife gives me a lot of loving care, but she looks so good because I buy her a lot of loving care.’ You ladies know what that is all about.”

• “I have never believed [that the world will end] because my Jesus is coming back to rule over me for one thousand years so it can’t end for at least 10 centuries.

• If you believe this book, 120 times it says the world will never end. What about Matthew 13:39 [he rattles off a series of citations] … Every one of those instances is a misinterpretation of God’s holy word. It should not say ‘world,’ it should say the end of the ‘age.’

• He shall reign for ever, and how long is forever? It’s forever.

• Forget the silly Protestant faiths that don’t believe all the Bible and twist everything, manipulating God’s holy word.

I’ve got two questions: 1) If Jesus is going to take over in as little as seven years, and everything’s going to be great for a thousand years, why would a believer be motivated to improve the Earth? 2) If the world will never end, despite nuclear catastrophe, despite everything—in fact, the catastrophe is necessary for Jesus’ return—where’s the benefit in preventing nuclear holocaust?