Not ready for prime politicians

Back in the early ‘70s, National Lampoon was king of humor, with a monthly mag that was uproariously irreverent, nasty and way funny. It featured a cast of talented folks who became the essence of Saturday Night Live and Animal House, among its many achievements. There was an album NatLamp put out called That’s Not Funny. That’s Sick! that was a classic. Bill Murray, John Belushi, Richard Belzer and Gilda Radner were featured. It was an absolute triumph. One of the bits was a hysterical quickie about a phone number you called to get insulted, a public service that provided the needy masochist with the daily diss he/she required to get by. One of the more memorable insults was, “You’re a pathetic, cringing, little milksop!”

That line bubbled up in my memory recently when I stopped to consider the response of ReTrumplicans after that ultra-yummy Cohen-Manafort Courtroom Tag Team Tuesday. (Finally! We get a bone!) Mitch McConnell’s reaction to this mess was telling, with Mitch responding to a simple request for a comment by absolutely choking, eyes open wide, mouth froze up, the only sound being the gentle flapping of his flaccid, flabby jowls in the breeze. Hey! Mitch! Anybody home? We really are ready for your sage comments on your buddy Donaldo being exposed as a flaming fricking felon by Cohen and Stormy. Please? Something? Bulging eyes staring into headlights—in obvious need of jumbo tequila shot. Nyet? OK, super, and thanks for showing us (again) what a pathetic, cringing little milksop truly looks like!

Heller was just as bad. Just as silent. Just as pathetic. Just as milksop. It’s the perfect window sticker. “The Republican Party—just a bunch of pathetic, cringing, little milksops.” Why would anyone vote for any Republican ever ever ever again?

John McCain’s best moment? Easily last summer, on the night he went thumbs down on Trumpcare and shoved that POS up Twitler’s tailpipe. The most heroic vote ever. Of course Trump was gonna be a spiteful jerk after McCain’s death. Being clueless, after all, is his very special talent. So pick your colorful locker room description of Agent Orange response. (1) Stepped on his own dick. (2) The guy could fuck up a wet dream. Either one is just dandy!

Malevolent Incompetence, part 397—at least 500 Hispanic kids still separated from parents, with horrific possibility that many will never again see their folks. The lasting shame of Dum Dum McFakeprez. Want to do something? Give to the ACLU or RAICES.