Merry holidays

I’m not going to do a column panning Christmas this year. I’m not. I would, however, like to point out the Spirits of Consumerism devoured another holiday this year, Halloween.

Halloween used to be my son’s favorite holiday. I hope it still is. He was the one who was pissed off that Lowe’s had removed the Halloween decorations in favor of Christmas decorations before Halloween had passed. “What’s wrong with them?” he asked me. “Don’t they know it’s still October? Christmas isn’t until December.”

They were studying months in first grade that week. Doing a good job, too.

At any rate, he’s now been assimilated into the consumer culture. This was the first year he insisted on believing in Santa. This was also the first year his homework had a Christmas theme from the moment the hand-silhouette Thanksgiving turkey came off the wall. One of his best assignments was a tree with gifts, and the assignment was to imagine who he would give each gift to. The doll would go to his sister; I think his brother got a ball. Honest to God, I can’t recall who he said he’d give the gun to; maybe it was his best friend, Domenick.

I’m not huge on giving gifts at Christmas, and this year is tighter than some past years have been. Fortunately, the liars say it’s the thought that counts, so I’d like to pass some charitable Christmas thoughts to the leadership of this country. I expect they’re going to need some charitable thoughts next year.

I’d also like to offer everyone who reads this column a smile. You there, just purse your lips and turn the corners up. If there’s someone near you, incline your face toward them, see if they give you one back. Not only that, but if you happen to be at Meadowood, it’ll freak them out.

RTV No. 7: You can feel superior to people who say, “If you don’t vote, you don’t have the right to complain” because you know you get to complain no matter what.