Kickin’ It Old Skool
This one goes into my all-time top 10 worst movies ever seen. When a young break- dancer (Jamie Kennedy) actually breaks his neck performing an impossible move during a dance-off, he goes into a 20-year coma. Upon awakening, he discovers that Smurfs are no longer popular, porn is readily accessible, and homeless people fart and urinate en masse in the streets. Words can’t explain how painfully bad this film is, but I’ll try. Imagine your least favorite food (for argument’s sake, let’s say canned string beans). Now imagine canned string beans being served to you in your least favorite place (let’s say it’s a prison sewer). Now imagine canned string beans being forced down your throat while waist deep in a prison sewer, and Jamie Kennedy is the one holding the fork. I’ve never walked out of a movie that I set out to review, and the streak remains unbroken. I watched the whole thing, and I think permanent damage might’ve occurred. Jamie Kennedy is the spawn of Satan.