He’s a clown

Ronald is the corporate spokesman for McDonald’s Corporation. At the recent unveiling of the Ronald McDonald Care Mobile, after getting assurances that the Reno News & Review is a family-oriented newspaper, McDonald agreed to shoot the shit for a few minutes. He claims to be the only Ronald McDonald in the country. According to the McDonaldland Web site, McDonald is second only to Santa Claus in terms of recognition. In his first TV appearance in 1963, the clown was portrayed by none other than Willard Scott.

So, Ronald, how long have you been Ronald McDonald?

All my life.

And how old are you?

You have to count the stripes on my socks.

How many events do you do as spokes …

You mean a year or a day?

A year, I suppose.

Pretty much every day. About 120 major events a year.

Do you do the commercials, too …

Well, yeah.

… or do you have an actor stand in?

We do the commercials and the video tapes. Do you have one?

No, I don’t.

It’s so cool. You ought to see me animated.

You’re pretty animated now. How many changes of clothing do you own?

How many changes of clothing?

Yeah, do you ever get out in your civies?

I am now. I have a pair of pajamas at home just like these. I never have to worry what I’m going to wear.

Where do you buy your orthopedic shoes?

Longs.

What is the benefit to the state by having this Ronald McDonald care mobile?

Hey, if you look at it, well, it’s a cool thing. What it’s for is it goes to all the outlying areas, to children in need. It’s half medical, half dental. It’s the coolest thing around. There are only 15 of these in the whole country, and we have one, right here. It’s a pretty neat thing for all the children.

Do you have any idea how many children it will serve?

They’re going to do as many as they can. St. Mary’s is preparing the schedule as we speak.

Will you ever go along on the care mobile?

We’ve already scheduled for Yerington. Myself, the Hamburglar, Grimace. We’re all there.

What is the Hamburglar really like?

What do you think? Hamburgers.

No, what is the Hamburgler really like, not what does he really like?

If you want to know that, you should show up in Yerington.