Full hipster potential

Feeling like I had not met my full hipster potential in life, I decided to boost my street cred by attending a poetry reading at Bows & Arrows, featuring Shirley Posh, Jessalyn Joy Wakefield, Richard St. Ofle and Josh Fernandez.

Part clothing boutique and part venue for local music, artists and writers, the Bows & Arrows Collective also houses Fat Face cafe, which boasts a pretty decent food menu, as well as popsicles with interesting flavor combinations, such as Thai tea and sweet potato.

And for those willing to face the cold for that rush of nicotine, there’s also a side patio with a small fire that gives off just enough heat to keep your fingers from falling off while smoking.

On this particular Saturday, I started my night out with an Alaskan Double Black IPA served, hipster style, in a mason jar and seated myself at a large table. Later, I learned that the kind person who offered me an enviable seat at the front of the crowd was none other than Posh, one of the featured readers.

We sat, surrounded by about 40 other people who were scattered around while Posh, raised in Sacramento and recently returned after a stay in Southern California, performed in her hometown for the first time. She explained at the start of her reading that most of her work is an ode to her favorite word, poop.

“I have a lot of pieces that discuss that. It’s funny to me, and I hope it’s funny to a lot of people,” she said. She followed through with her promise and read a love letter she wrote to a solo piece of excrement that was about to embark on his journey down the toilet and through the sewage pipes. She wished him well on his journey and encouraged him to make a difference in the people’s lives that he would touch.

How do you follow something like that?

Well, in Posh’s case, you read a list of requirements for your soul mate: someone who would be willing to follow around anyone wearing baggy pants to determine if they were just hiding a peg leg.

Wakefield went for a more serious approach, explaining to the crowd that she approaches writing as a scientist and studies what language does to the people.

St. Ofle, who also served as the host and emcee of the night, spoke of an awkward doctor’s visit, which left him wondering if drinking too much coffee would ultimately lead to the demise of his testicles, after discussing the effects of simultaneously smoking marijuana and masturbating with his friend, Bob Love.

Finally, Fernandez read an ode to the four blocks that made him a man in his neighborhood in Boston. He finished with a plea to Sacramento, threatening to refer it to as “Sac” until it returned his beloved Iron Maiden wallet to his hand, adding that if it came down to it, the wallet was crusty enough to eat.

Afterward, the authors stuck around to sell their books and talk to the audience, which appeared to be made up mostly of their friends and family.

So, I did it—I attended my first poetry reading at Bows & Arrows. I drank beer from a mason jar and contemplated purchasing an ironic, ugly holiday sweater. Assured that I had reached my full hipster potential, I finally bid Bows & Arrows adieu.