Buyer beware

Dave Weiner is a longtime California resident. He has no accomplishments worthy of mention and no social stature.

Some friends were lured by a charming salesman into considering an awesome new car. They were told there’d be almost no upfront or long-term cost, and in the excitement of the moment they bought the thing.

The cost of the car, however, turned out to be enormous and well beyond their ability to pay. They complained to the salesman, who told them, with a wink, that they could just put the cost on credit and leave it to their kids to deal with. He insisted he was blameless because he’d been misled by bad information, but that didn’t really matter because buying the car was a great thing anyway.

“You see,” he said, “this car will do a lot for the environment, and as its inferior competition is eliminated, everyone will want the car and be the better for it.”

But the car created plumes of stink everywhere it was driven. Angry locals pelted the car wherever it appeared.

So my friends returned again to the salesman, who told them, “You’ve got to understand and be patient. Adversity has to be expected.” The salesman said he “fully realized” the situation. He told my friends they should just trust him that the futuristic nature of the car would spearhead a generational transformation in automotive technology from which the entire world would benefit. He said he “expected” my friends to keep the car for many years.

Eventually, once my friends realized that they thoroughly distrusted the salesman, their only reasonable course of action became plain. The only solution to their problem was to be rid of the car as quickly as possible and have nothing more to do with the distrusted salesman.

The really sad part is that the misbegotten car was very difficult to unload and it put my friends in hock for the rest of their lives. Driving the reeking beast made them widely hated, and the car’s only generational affect was the misery it caused.

The salesman, however, is understood to be doing very well in his lucrative retirement.