Slackers

Rated 1.0 Three college buddies cheating their way through life get blackmailed into helping a campus dork win the heart of a female student—then one of the buddies falls for her himself. The film was written by David H. Steinberg and directed by Dewey Nicks; it features Devon Sawa, Jason Segal and Michael C. Maronna as the buddies, Jason Schwartzman as the dork, and James King as the target coed. Others in the cast include Mamie Van Doren (who, believe it or not, is still alive), Leigh Taylor Young, Gedde Watanabe, and an uncredited Cameron Diaz. I mention them all because the film is revolting, despicable garbage and all of them deserve never, ever, ever to live it down. Or does the idea of a man singing a duet of “She’ll Be Comin’ Around the Mountain” with his sock-covered penis sound funny to you?