Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning

Any horror fan looking for a cool origin story out of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning is in for a bloody letdown. This “beginning” for Leatherface feels like the results of an elementary school writing contest where the topic was “How did the big scary guy with a skin mask get that chainsaw?” When you find out how, you’ll realize that this horror series, which went creatively bankrupt after Tobe Hooper’s somewhat amusing sequel The Texas Chain Saw Massacre 2, needs to die a grisly chainsaw death. The first remake was an admirable failure. The film looked decent, had Jessica Biel’s glorious butt and a few genuinely creepy moments. The Beginning delivers the gore and uncomfortable atmosphere but is tremendously lacking in original ways to present them. Just to let you know, this isn’t coming from a cinematic purist who denounces the notion of remaking or revisiting classic horror films. I absolutely dug the Dawn of the Dead remake, and the new The Hills Have Eyes was actually better than the Wes Craven original. This one is just a dreary slog, turning Leatherface into the most boring slasher villain out there.