Have a cow, man

Every once in a while, I get hungry for a burger, and it’s a serious craving—one that can only be satisfied by a good old-fashioned, American-style burger joint. In Reno, the best place to go is Juicy’s Giant Hamburgers. I like places like Juicy’s—they specialize in one thing and only one thing, burgers!

When I approached the counter to order my burger, I could see the grill in action. It’s a flat-top grill, which is the best means to cook a burger. It stays moist while it cooks in its own juices.

Some of my cooking buddies and I used to debate what makes the best burger, and we all agreed on a few details. First, the patty has to be a third of a pound (Juicy’s has that). If it’s bigger than a third of a pound, it’s just too big, and it makes the bun all soggy, which is just gross. Second, it has to be cooked on a flat-top grill (as mentioned, Juicy’s has that). This creates an even crust on the meat that traps in the flavor and gives it a nice texture. Last, it has to have one slice of American cheese on it (Juicy’s has that, too), just out of respect for the old-fashioned American way.

In my opinion, Juicy’s observes and practices all the best burger-making techniques and unwritten laws of “burgerology.” It makes plain and simple that a burger is just a burger. The more you mess with it, the more messed up it gets, and you have lost the vision of the pure essence of this fine American cuisine.

Juicy’s has been a Reno favorite since 1981. It has the raw appeal that a good burger joint needs, and you can smell it a mile a way.

So when you go to Juicy’s, there is no doubt in your mind what you are going to order—a burger. For less than 10 bucks, I ordered a regular cheeseburger ($4.81), a small fries ($1.41) and a small soda ($1.16). I added bacon for $.88 —I know, what happened to the pure essence of fine American cuisine? Bacon makes everything better, trust me on this one. My total came in under $9. I was happy with that—the days of $5 lunches are over, my friends. If you are paying less than $5 for a lunch that includes a side order and a soda, you might need to be a little concerned with what exactly it is you’re eating. Can you say “mystery meat?”

I will always go to Juicy’s if a burger is what I’m craving. It’s reliable. I get spoiled eating at fancy restaurants all the time, but the finest of all fine dining cannot cure the craving for a burger. When I was eating at Juicy’s this time, I ran in to one of the area’s top chefs, and he said, “I gotta have a burger!”